Many of us find a new partner after divorce. Your ex-husband may be one of them. This can be difficult for you emotionally. My ex just took no break whatsoever. His relationship was the cause of our break. She moved in with him two months after he left my house. She left after just over a year. I was elated.
His departure has been satisfactory on many levels. My feelings stemmed from my illness, and that also came from the disruption and pain that had led the life of my children. But I admit that revenge was a factor. I liked the feeling that my ex was finally getting his comeuppance. Now he would feel the sting of rejection. I wanted him to suffer this. I had a good reason. He had thrown out 13 years of marriage, and I wanted him to pay for it.
His girlfriend was a painful reminder of all that, and I could not help but relieved that his life no longer intersected with mine or my children's.
But these feelings of relief and satisfaction were quickly tempered by the fact that soon found another girlfriend. I decided that any woman who was better than before, but still I wondered, as you might want to date a route, often unemployed, overweight, bald man?
His new girlfriend was only 24, 14 years his junior. He seemed nice enough, but basically still bothered me that he was happy. Despite all the books I had read on spirituality, forgiveness and love, I still felt anger.
Try as I might, I could not understand these feelings. I no longer had any physical attraction for this man. I have not even him. Why do I care? The real reason was that I wanted him to suffer for what he did to me.
And 'normal to have mixed feelings long after the divorce is final. A former partner may provoke new hostilities whenever it comes into contact with your children. This is inevitable. Your life was turned upside down. The familiar and routine are changed forever. Even if your marriage was full of anger, was still the life they knew. Some prisoners find safety in a prison cell. Marriage can be the same.
With divorce new people enter your life, some not by choice. It is necessary to find a way to treat your ex back love. This is difficult if you are not currently in a relationship yourself. Why him, but not me? She asks over and over again.
Feeling like a good person and you deserve love. You feel as if your ex deserves loneliness and pain. Just take personally. The right person will appear. Although it may not seem so now, will arrive just in time. Be careful. Look before you leap. No need to risk repeating a painful experience. Take your ex has happened as an omen. You know that if it can happen to him quickly, you also find love. If his new love proves fleeting, do not rejoice or worry. The longer you wait more chances you have for a true lasting love.
Do not jump into something just to try it yourself. This is not a competition. This is a serious search for a love that will last a lifetime. There is no need to suffer again.
This does not mean you should ignore your negative emotions. Release. Talk with a friend or therapist. Punch a pillow. Wait until you are alone, then call your ex every name in the dirty book. Shout It and screaming. May all go. Let go of all the pain, hurt, and betrayal. The process can take months or even years, but you will feel better over time.
Someone special and your divorce will fade into memory. Will no longer harbor feelings of hatred towards your ex. You arrive to accept your ex for what it is, and wish him well.
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